Dr. Hannah Vaughan-Spruce
From: Diocese of Plymouth, England, United Kingdom
Consecration Date: 11/01/19 Feast of All Saints
Immediate Family: My immediate family includes my Mum and Dad, 2 sisters, 1 brother, 2 nephews and 4 nieces
Spiritual Children: I have 3 godchildren, and others I have mentored or been an older ‘sister’ to
Education: Undergraduate degree in Theology, University of Cambridge, UK; MA in Theology and Catechetics, Maryvale Institute, UK; PhD Sociology of Religion, St Mary’s University Twickenham UK.
Current Job: Executive Director of Global Mission, Divine Renovation Ministry
How did the Divine Bridegroom call you to be His bride as a CV and how did you respond?
Through my twenties, I lived in London and worked for a parish and then for a diocese. Throughout that time, whenever I had the courage to pay attention to the deep, still voice within, I knew that Jesus was calling me to a celibate vocation – but lived in the midst of the world. If I was honest, it was frightening. I did not know any women living such a life, except a few in secular institutes, but I didn’t feel called to belong to any of them. I continued for a number of years discerning through spiritual direction, attending retreats, and continue to grow deeper in union with the Lord. This period could be hard at times. I wondered if I was mistaken, if I’d ‘missed’ something, if really I was supposed to be married, or whether I would end up taking a private vow of celibacy, which somehow didn’t feel ‘enough’. But the Lord upheld me through those years and held me steadfast.
Finally, aged 31, I came across an article in Cosmopolitan magazine. Even now I laugh that it took a secular magazine to introduce me to my vocation! The magazine featured a young American consecrated virgin, with the headline, ‘I am happily married to God.’ I was blown away. As I read her story, I knew that everything about consecrated virginity was what I had been searching for all those long years. A vocation lived in the world, completely consecrated to Jesus, a contemplative yet apostolic calling firmly rooted in the diocese and serving the local Church. This was ‘me’!
Outstanding moment/grace from your Consecration Mass:
Lying on the cold, hard floor of the cathedral sanctuary as the Litany of Saints was sung over me was a beautiful moment. It was a strange feeling of being exactly where I should be, and yet far greater than I could imagine.
Typical day in your life:
Roughly 1/4 of my time I am travelling for work on mission, while 3/4 of my life is at home (where I work remotely). I live in a remote coastal village in England, next door to a community of contemplative nuns, so this context shapes what my daily life looks like.
My day starts praying the Office of Readings and Morning Prayer at home, in the early morning light with a big cup of coffee. I love these early hours of the day alone with my Bridegroom. The mornings are normally spent doing some “deep work” and planning, writing or strategic thinking. At midday, I head off for Mass next door at the convent. My sister is often there too with my little niece and once or twice a week we might have a quick lunch together in a local coffee shop.
Back in my home office, everything kicks off from around 1pm when all my North American colleagues come online! I lead a global team of over 20 people, and from 1-6pm my day is normally back-to-back meetings and calls. It is intense and fast-paced but I love it.
At some point during the day, I break for 15 minutes for tea and Prayer during the Day. I also get out for a circular 40 minute coastal walk which is needed to get some exercise, fresh air, and new perspective. I also try and do some simple stretching or Pilates during the day… I’ve learned that I need all this to help me be my best while working from home. There are often lay people and priests on retreat at the convent next door so often I find myself having conversations, walks, or coffee with a retreatant at some point during the day.
6pm is my cut-off from work, because it is Vespers at the convent! It is so helpful to have this in place to push me out the door to go and pray, otherwise I could find myself working too late. I join the sisters for Vespers and Adoration and come home to eat dinner at 7:30pm. I intentionally unwind in the evenings, doing any household chores, reading, or a call with a CV friend. Then, Night Prayer and bed!
Hobbies/what you like to do in your free time:
I live in a beautiful place called Exmoor in the southern coast of England, and I love hiking at weekends, or in the summer time, swimming in the sea. I am an avid reader of classic literature! Dickens, Austen, Tolstoy, Eliot…. I love them all. I love spending time with my nephews and nieces, sleepovers or walks on Exmoor. Occasionally I will take one of them for an “auntie adventure” day out.
How you serve in the Church?
I am unusual in that I serve the Church both on the global level through my job, and on the very local level in my village. The ministry I work for is international, so I connect a lot with America, Canada, Australia, and other European countries, as well as further afield. We work in the renewal of parish, coaching priests and their lay leaders to lead mission-focused parishes. We are coaching over 1500 parishes around the world and it is incredibly rewarding to see priests renewed and parish comes to life. It involves some international travel so I have the blessing of seeing the Church around the world. Then, on the local level, I live in a tiny village, with an even tinier Catholic population! We have around 20 parishioners at a Sunday Mass! We also have many retreatants and visiting priests coming through all the time. I try to respond to whatever the Holy Spirit is putting in front of me: serving on the coffee rota after Sunday Mass, hosting people for lunches or dinners, taking time for a spiritual conversation with someone, just getting stuck into the local community. It is rich and rewarding on an entirely different scale!
How do you take care of your health?
For me, health is very important, especially living alone. I think there are risks living alone when we are not surrounded by community to keep us accountable and we can fall into bad habits. I’ve noticed how in my life spiritual, physical and emotional health are all tied together. Therefore I tend to embed habits and customs in my life to look after physical and emotional as well as spiritual health. For example, good exercise every day – a walk in nature; nutritious and healthy food – I generally avoid sugar and snacks; getting enough sleep through early bed time; intentional connections with those who fill my tank! All of this helps me get well-regulated physically and emotionally and contributes to greater availability and openness to Jesus and what he is doing in my life, and to others who need me.
What does community look like for you?
My day-to-day community is my local village – the neighbours who live around me, parishioners I see throughout the day at Mass and times of prayer, family who live close by, the contemplative community of nuns next door. We are a small, close-knit community, people tend to know what’s going on in each other’s lives, everyone extremely ready to help out.
It’s also a sign of the times that “remote” community is extremely important to me, too! I have friends and sisters in Christ who are also CVs who I connect with round the world. Normally, every week involves 2 or 3 video calls, either with individual friends, with a group for ongoing formation, with a discerner, or a podcast recording. This is all essential community for me as well.
I’d also count my work colleagues as community. We work intensively 40 hours a week together online, in and out of remote calls every day, praying together, working through projects, successes, problems, learnings, and sharing each other’s lives together.
Challenges in the CV vocation and how you address those?
There’s a danger when living alone that you become self-sufficient and self-contained, but as humans we are supposed to need others, and to be in relation with others. I spot these dangers in myself when I become too independent, e.g., relying on my own resources to figures everything out, fix everything, fill gaps that are heavy-lifting for me. Sometimes it is easier to do that, than to express your need to others. But I try and intentionally rely on others, e.g., asking close neighbours to help with something that needs fixing on my house; letting local friends and family help when you are sick; even just expressing to your inner circle when you are not emotionally at your best… All this is intentional relationality, and it’s essential to being human!
What causes, subjects, or current events are you passionate about?
The renewal of parishes feels like my main life mission! I have worked in parishes since age 23, and the last 8 years I have worked for Divine Renovation ministry, seeing extraordinary growth in the numbers of parishes we are coaching towards missional health since 2018. It has been incredible to be at the heart of a movement of thousands of parishes around the world. I feel like there’s a grace in being a consecrated virgin at the heart of this mission: I am called to image the Church as Bride, and my daily work is concerned with renewing the youthfulness, energy, and passion of the Bride of the local church.
Favorite Scripture verse or passage and why?
“I sat down under his shadow with great delight, and his fruit was sweet to my taste.” (Song of Songs 2:3) For me, this line summarises all the joy and contentment I have experienced of life with Jesus since being consecrated.
Favorite CV resources:
- The One Bride, by Sr. Mary Klimisch
- Mary, The Church at the Source, by von Balthasar / Ratzinger
- Anything by Mother Mary Francis, especially her conferences on Brideship
How has your relationship with God changed/deepened since becoming a CV?
I think when you lay down your life for the Lord in such a radical way, nothing really stays the same. You have handed yourself over now. I’ve found there is a new driving force in my life that does not come from me, but rather, I simply assent to it. Giving ourselves to Jesus in a spousal offering will mean that he takes us at our word. He wants to share with us in everything. Shortly after being consecrated I experienced this in a new way through a close priest friend who I was with through an extremely difficult time. During that time, it was like the Lord showed me he wanted me at his side, deep in the Paschal Mystery, in some of the deepest and unfathomable mysteries in the world and in the Church. There is little we understand in this contemplative calling, but the Lord simply asks for our presence there, and in a uniquely feminine way, to hold the mystery – including suffering, darkness and evil – pondering in our hearts.
This contemplative calling at the heart of our vocation means that prayer has become everything to me. In my holy hour each day, I often do not understand what the Lord is doing, but I don’t need to.
How have you/your life changed since becoming a CV?
When I think back to my consecration day, I recognise how little I knew of what was about to happen. My formation was patchy and there were aspects of the vocation I hadn’t entered into deeply. But it is amazing how the Lord makes up for all the holes and gaps. Our formation doesn’t have to be perfect. Since that day, my life has changed unimaginably! Shortly after being consecrated I connected with incredible CV women in the United States, and one friendship led to another. The Lord has blessed me with deep and beautiful friendships which I did not expect at all on the day of my consecration. I probably thought that I would live the consecration in quite a solitary way, not knowing many British women close in age who I could share this life with. But I could not have been more wrong! This is the most extravagant way that the Lord has surprised me… just the depth of communion, friendship and love it is possible to have with sisters in Christ, even though we do not live together.
Which Saint has been your biggest inspiration as a CV and why?
All the early virgins of the Church… These are not timid wallflowers, they are sassy and bold, often speaking the truth fearlessly to powers who then took their lives. Of course, we don’t have direct testimony from these women, but the witness we have from Church Fathers and others paints a picture of bold, heroic, holy women – living in a hostile and anti-Christian world. I think their apostolic zeal is a great source of inspiration.
Most inspiring art in general in your life and why?
I remember visiting the Sagrada Familia cathedral in Barcelona, Spain several years ago and being overawed by its beauty. In particular, as we stood in the crypt of the cathedral, the tour guide pointed out the ‘keystone’ of the entire edifice – a stone in the highest point of the crypt depicting the angel’s annunciation to Mary and her fiat. It would have been easy to miss it, but this keystone is at the heart of the whole building. Directly above it is the altar in the sanctuary, a beautiful crucifix, and above that a ring of fifty lights depicting Pentecost and the Holy Spirit. (Look it up – it is amazing!) In other words, Gaudi the architect was showing that the entire mystery of Redemption – the death, resurrection of Christ, coming of the Holy Spirit – all rests on the fragile ‘yes’ of Mary. For me, this has been a powerful image of the power of our frail, human ‘yes’ as virgins, and the spiritual “edifices” the Lord can build upon them.
Advice to women discerning this vocation:
Do not be afraid! The Lord knows exactly how he has made you, and how you will be most happy and fulfilled. If consecrated virginity is the life for you, you will be extraordinarily happy and at peace – even in the midst of trials. There is nothing to fear in revealing your deepest self and longings to the Lord – and being real with your spiritual director – because one way or another you will land where you are supposed to be. Be at peace, and move forward peacefully in your discernment. You are completely safe in the Father’s hands.
Resources:
My full story is here.
My professional email: hannah.vaughanspruce@divinerenovation.org
